Why is my computer determined to piss me off?

Question

Seriously... I come home one night and decide to go on the computer so I press the "On" button. I wait. And wait.

After a while my computer comes on. Then I press start and go on Firefox... after waiting around 5 minutes, it finally comes on.

I try to type youtube... when I am done I look at the search bar... "Yout"... And my mouse is an hourglass. So I'm OK, I wait a few minutes and then it comes on. I press enter and click on youtube. 10 minutes later it comes on. Then I go on a youtube video and press play.

After waiting 5 minutes for it to buffer, it finally plays the first 30 seconds when BAM "Virus database has been updated." NOT RESPONDING. WTF? I don't give a **** about virus databases.

So I turn it off and after 5 minutes i get it back up. I set the thing to full screen and it goes smoothly. Then when it finally gets to the good part... "Your computer needs to automatically update in 5 minutes." So I'm like.. **** that! And click "do later." or something like that, bad move... my video has now crashed and I can't get out of full screen mode by pressing escape. So I click Ctrl + Alt + Del... my task manager pops up. So I highlight firefox and click end now. It doesn't go away. End now. End now! END NOW!!! Then 3 popup boxes come up asking me if I want to... END NOW! Well no **** Sherlock! But they don't End now. They stay. For 10 more minutes. Each.

So, I'm back on my computer, try and open firefox again but... "Firefox is still on but not responding. Please end the process or restart you computer... betch." So I'm going berserk naw and decide to go on Internet explorer when in the bottom right corner of my screen... "You have recieved and Email from Youtube." I'm like, "OK". So I move my mouse. Or try to. My mouse is just sitting there, stuck to the screen. I press Ctrl + Alt + Del. Nothing happens. MY task manager has failed me. My computer has crashed.

So I turn it off with the standby button and wait once more for it to load up. I open Firefox when... "Your computer needs to restart in 15 minutes."

My keyboard has never been the same again. What do I do to make my computer stop being such an asshole?

Answer 1

If you get a Mac book you wont have a problem

Answer 2

Goin crazy on the computer isn't going to do you any good. Somedays computers take longer than usual to boot. Just have some patience. If the loading is real slow, then don't put it in sleep or standbye mode anymore, just shut down the thing.

Next you should check the integrity of the hard drive, try defragging the thing and run some maintenence on it once a week. Defrags, Chkdsk, and other scans. These simple tasks are vital to the life of your computer.

Once a month you should dust out the computer and clean it, excessive dust buildup can cause overheating within the case and could lead to decreased performance.

Answer 3

Those virus databases you don't give a **** about help you protect your computer. Sounds like you have a possible malware or virus problem. Computers follow the example of their owners. So if your computer is being an asshole....



Reformat your drive, reinstall your operating system AND antivirus software (make sure it updates and wait until it's done with the updates.

Answer 4

If your computer is over 5 years old throw it in the trashcan. If it's not that old, take it to a computer shop and ask them.

Answer 5

I seek advice from somebody approximately it, do no longer seek advice from them until eventually i'm no longer mad anymore (whether it rather is hours, days, weeks, months or years) then whilst i think like being around them back, I make the circulate!

Answer 6

yes, you might have Malware, virus. also it is helpful if you upgrade your RAM (memory), but most definitely you have virus!

Answer 7

Because it hates you....